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Our phones, our selves
What kind of relationship do we want to have with our phones?
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There is a lot of nuance when it comes to how cell phones have shaped our culture, and particularly how the presence of cell phones in schools changes impacts students and teachers. Today I want to share a couple of pieces I’ve read recently that have me thinking about the idea of harm reduction when it comes to cell phones and surveillance.
Harm reduction, for those of you unfamiliar, is the idea that we can establish practices and policies that mitigate the harmful impacts of certain behaviors. It is most often discussed in the context of drug and alcohol use, as well as exposure to sexually transmitted infections (for example, needle exchange programs). I’m not prepared to dive into the research on technology addiction, but I think we can all identify ways in which cell phones have changed how we interact with each other and the world. Some of those ways are positive (I’ve been able to maintain contact with friends all over the country/world) and some are less positive (please don’t look at my screen time reports).
Put the phone away, kids
The first article is about the smartphone ban at Buxton School in Massachusetts. As Tik Root writes in The Guardian, Buxton has made a conscious decision to eliminate smartphones from campus, and instead provided everyone (including staff) with a light phone that can make calls, slowly send texts, and not much else. Unlike most of our phones, they are designed to be as unengaging as possible. Buxton is a boarding school, which is an important component of this plan, but from everything I’ve read it sounds like this shift has had a significant and positive impact on their culture. Smartphones come with lots of tools to help people limit their use (focus settings, app time limits, etc.) but it’s hard to stick to those limits when “everyone else” is sharing information. The fear of missing out (FOMO) is strong, but so is the fear of finding out - what did you miss while you weren’t connected? Are you out of the loop? If you “miss” something important will you be able to fill in the blanks? If you’re not connected to your phone, you may also miss out on connecting with your friends.
Buxton saw a similar progression through the stages of panic, grief and ultimately some level of acceptance. “When it was announced I practically had a breakdown,” said then senior Max Weeks. And while he’s still not a fan of what he says was a “unilateral” decision to switch to the Light Phone, he said, overall, the experience “hasn’t been as bad as I expected”.
Cell phones were not a thing when I was in high school, but there was plenty of note-passing, whispered conversations between classes, and even talking on landline phones. Teenagers will use the tools available to them to build relationships and establish their identities. I know not having a smartphone now is very different than me not having one in 1996; expectations and norms have changed. Students (and parents) are used to being able to easily contact other people. And access to a pocket computer has helped me find answers to questions when I’m out in the world. Knowing how to use a smartphone effectively and responsibly is a skill that students will need. From my own experiences, however, I can say I see students interacting with each other, and the adults around them, much more when they don’t have smartphones. I still believe that building relationships in person – while navigating awkwardness, boredom, and uncertainty – is also a skill students will need. I think one thing the ubiquity of cell phones has taken from us is the opportunity to practice being in a new situation and not retreating into the familiar world of the internet.
I was recently having a conversation with some friends about how we made plans when we were college without access to cell phones. We had landlines in our dorm rooms where we could leave messages and instant messenger for coordinating and chatting. But a lot of what we did was just… hang out in visible places and wait for someone to come by. We’d show up to the dining hall at “the usual time” knowing we’d likely find someone there. We were all likely to find our way to the campus coffee shop at some point in the evening. Our plans involved lots of serendipity, but also a lot of “um, no one I know is here yet what do I do?” As uncomfortable as that could be, I’m glad I got the practice. Smartphones can help us move through the world independently (thank you, navigation apps) but putting the phone aside can help us gain confidence in that independence.
You too, adults
The next article is from Anne Helen Petersen’s Culture Study newsletter, in which she talks to Devorah Heitner about parents using technology to track their kids. Any teacher who has ever told a student to put away a phone during class has heard “it was just a text from my mom!” in response. And sure, that’s not always the truth, but sometimes it is. Even if parents aren’t intending to disrupt class, an unread notification is hard for a student to resist. Cell phones have made it easier for parents to communicate after school plans, early pick-up for a doctor’s appointment, or just to check-in during the day. Those points of connection can be really important for kids, but the level of access parents can have adds layers of nuance to those connections.
Access to text messages, shared passwords for social media, and various classroom apps have given parents more of a window into their children’s lives than previous generations have had. Tracking apps can make it easier for parents to feel confident letting their kids go to new places; they can also make it harder for kids to develop their sense of independence. Having access to your child’s texts or social media can help parents know when trouble is brewing, or when a kid might need more guidance on how to use those apps responsibly. However, if that’s done covertly it can undermine trust. Similarly with being able to access a child’s grades. I know teenagers are not always forthcoming with answers about their school days, but I’ve also seen students have their day derailed by a message from a parent who had seen a bad grade before the student had an opportunity to talk to them about it. The ease of accessing and responding to information can make communication more transactional.
But for sure, trust is hard: it has to be negotiated and re-negotiated. And even “consent” needs to be considered carefully. If we tell our kids that “opting in” to a tracking app is a condition of having a phone, or driving, our power in the negotiation blurs the line between our kids’ consent and their capitulation.
I think a lot about teenagers’ right to privacy, as well as the right to make mistakes. We want to help kids avoid mistakes that will have long-term repercussions. We know that the ease with which incidents can be recorded and shared can mean that a bad choice can reverberate for a long time. But there’s no way to prevent all mistakes, especially not if we want young people to also develop a sense of independence. I don’t have kids of my own, but I’ve spent many years working in schools and I don’t envy anyone who is having to navigate safety and independence, surveillance and uncertainty. I won’t attempt to give parents advice on how to approach this (but I highly recommend the linked article), but I think we can all be better about talking about how we navigate privacy when we don’t always have full agency over how our information is shared. We all make trade-offs about what privacy we’re willing to give up in exchange for access or convenience – and as adults those trade-offs are much more likely to be negotiated with corporations, not our parents. Having those conversations with trusted adults can help prepare students for the trade-offs they’ll need to make on an ongoing basis.
Let’s all establish some boundaries
Several months ago I took the advice I’ve been giving to students for years and started keeping my phone outside my bedroom at night. It was not easy at first; I was anxious about the possibility of someone needing me in the middle of the night (a situation that has almost never happened), and weirdly unsure what to do with myself when I woke up and didn’t have a phone to grab so I could scroll through notifications (answer: get out of bed and start my day). Now, however, I can’t imagine going back. Not only do I sleep better, but I feel less dependent on access to my phone during the day, too. I still turn to it distract myself or make waiting more bearable, but I feel less of a compulsion to be checking it at all times.
The thread that’s tying these two articles together for me is the idea of shifting who (or what) is the driver in decisions we make about smartphones, tracking, and who has access to us and our information. It’s not a novel observation to note that just because we can do something it doesn’t mean we should, and the faster the pace of change the more intentional we need to be about weighing benefits and drawbacks. I’m wondering about where the friction points should be as we adopt new technologies of all kinds, and how we have intentional conversations with each other and with our students about what we’re gaining and what we’re giving up. We can’t reduce the harms until we can identify them.
Thanks for reading! Want to work with me to help your community develop the skills they need to be savvy consumers and creators of information? Get in touch!
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